B.A.P-1004 Angel

You’re like an angel, who has left me and gone somewhere
I need you

I don’t know how I’m living
After you left me, I’m going crazy
Every day, every night
I can’t even sleep
I’m all alone, drinking away, cry

So I miss you (I think of you) and I need you (every day)
I can still hear your voice
Come back to me (I don’t have anyone) Come back to my side (but you)
You’re like an angel

The reason I live is you
I don’t think I can see you anymore, I think I’m really dying
The person to love me is you
Shine on me in the darkness

Look at me now
Come to me now
(Come back to me, how am I supposed to live?)
Look at me now
Come to me now
(How am I supposed to live without you every day?)

I didn’t know you would really leave me
You were like an angel
Why am I such a good-for-nothing?

Oh no, you have turned away from me
I’m a fool who has lost you
I’m like a beggar
I can’t do anything without you

So I miss you (I think of you) and I need you (every day)
My wasted self is so pitiful
Hug me (I don’t have anyone) Embrace me (but you)
You’re like an angel

The reason I live is you
I don’t think I can see you anymore, I think I’m really dying
The person to love me is you
Shine on me in the darkness

It’s like I’m so out of it
I’m so blank every day
After you left, I’ve become ruined
Come back to me, I only had you

Hurry and save me
Stop, please don’t go far from me (don’t leave)
Never let you go

I want to find you
Where, where, where am I going?
To the place where you are
A better day, a better day, a better day
You’re like an angel

The reason I live is you
I don’t think I can see you anymore, I think I’m really dying
The person to love me is you
Shine on me in the darkness

Look at me now
Come to me now
(Come back to me, how am I supposed to live?)
Look at me now
Come to me now
(How am I supposed to live without you every day?)

What really struck me the other day was how easy it was to delete history.  No, I don’t mean that you can travel back in time and change, say, the outcome of the French and Indian War.  What I mean is the history in your computer.

            Technically, you can argue that it isn’t “deleting” history so much as “concealing” it.  But that’s not what I was thinking about either.

            Many people have asked me over the years, “What would you change if you could go back in time?”  Usually, I’d just shrug it off with a simple response: “I don’t know”.  If I was feeling feisty, maybe I’d say something along the lines of, “Your birth”.  However, I’ve never really thought into this question.

            I remember a comic that I stopped reading after perhaps the first chapter.  It wasn’t so much boring as that it didn’t really interest me.  Maybe that means the same thing, but it doesn’t really matter right now.

            Anyways, the story plot went something like this: A man paid money to go on a tour back to the dinosaur ages to hunt a dinosaur.  However, after seeing the dinosaur crashing around in the forest, he became too scared and decided to back out.  The other men went to hunt the dinosaur, and the tour guide warned the man to stay on the path that had been carved out by the company.  However, the man accidentally stepped off the path and onto a butterfly.  When the crew returned home, they were shocked to discover how changed their time was.  Their surroundings had changed, and even the English they perceived was broken, with plenty of grammatical and spelling errors.  All because of the death of a small, seemingly insignificant butterfly.   

"The fluttering of a butterfly's wings can effect climate changes on the other side of the planet." - Paul Ehrlich

Summon the Ancients-Society's Decay

I walk amongst the scum of the earth
Back stabbing liars and hypocrites
I refuse to settle this
Last time I try to do this
I am enslaved
With all of them 

Fake politicians guide us 
They determine the disease 
I will terminate this
 I will not ties
Bringing these eyes upon mankind 

Fix this race 
Tell these lies
This is not the same
society is wasting
 I will watch society decay

This is not the way it should be
everyone just is a two faced thief
I've watched this so many times
This will all crumble before us
Bitter hearts will beat the same in this hell
This all could be avoided
I'll see your face in hell

Today, someone correcting my essay asked me if "gesticulation" was a real word.  I was flabbergasted.  That was my favorite word in middle school, maybe even in 6th grade!  And a high school senior was asking me if it even existed.  It would have been okay if he didn't know what it meant, but the fact that it wasn't even familiar to him shocked me.

People have been praising the new revised version of the SAT because now that students don't have to study "weird" words, they can put more effort into the other sections and have less stress.  But even though you might not use those words in regular conversations, the fact that you have an expanded vocabulary might come in handy in college or writing formal letters.  Now that people don't have to study "weird" words (oh come on, words such as "spew" and "spur" are considered SAT words.  Everyone should know them by the time they have to take the test), there might be a general decline in the quality of writing people can expect.

Now, I'm not saying that my vocabulary is amazing or anything ( in fact, that was my weakest section of all).  I'm merely saying that if society starts to undermine the importance of a strong vocabulary, we might as well use Newspeak.  In fact, in the book 1984 by George Orwell, it states that "the whole aim of Newspeak is to narrow the range of thought", and that "in the end we shall make thoughtcrime literally impossible, because there will be no words in which to express it".  You learn to associate certain words with your experiences, but without those words, the value of those experiences disappear.  Without the means of expressing your reactions, the stimuli is rendered obsolete.


This is part of a song called I Ain't Got (A Good Enough Vocabulary): http://www.songsforteaching.com/fillyourhead/iaintgot.htm

Part of the lyrics are below:

She's so loquacious, tenacious, sagacious-but not too spacious
She's inscrutable, beautiful-it's irrefutable.
Never meek with us, obseqious, salutary when she speaks with us.
Munificent, beneficent, yeah she's magnificent

But she won't go out with me-because
I ain't got a good enough vocabulary
No-no-no she ain't got time for me-because
I ain't got a good enough vocabulary

Fear Factory-Scapegoat

He has not confessed
He has made no statement
Charges of murder
Have been accepted against him

Judges have decimated
Meanings of our laws
Already guilty?
Something has a flaw

Wrongly accused
Blindly confused
Open your eyes
Try to realize

Don't you know
You can't see
Too damn blind
To judge me!

Wrongly accused
Blindly confused
Open your eyes
Try to realize

Don't you know
You can't see
Too damn blind
To judge me!

Laws are meant to follow
But they've misled you
Conceal their meaning
So they can suit you
Misjudged by the system
No one every knows
Adding injury to insult
No one ever knows
No one
No one knows
No one
No one
No one knows...

Judges have decimated
Meanings of our laws
Already guilty?
Something has a flaw

Wrongly accused
Blindly confused
Open your eyes
Wake up, realize!

Scapegoat
Scapegoat
Scapegoat
Scape, goat
Scape, goat

How much government intervention are you okay with?  What's your line?  Has it already been drawn?

We had this discussion in class today comparing 1984 to modern America.  Though citizens value their free speech and numerous other rights, how much freedom do they actually have?  How do they know they aren't being watched right now through their cell phones or their computers?

For me, I'm okay with government screening everyone in airports and other public transportation.  However, they should not screen every conversation and household to protect citizens because it violates basic rights.  Even if family members were killed and the government desperately wants to capture the criminals, I would not support this notion.  

Before the Holocaust, Germany was starving from World War I.  Hitler hoped to keep the German citizens safe, and put his anger on a tangible scapegoat: the Jews.  The Germans couldn't blame human nature, as there would be no way to fix the situation.  Prejudice may also express anger:  when things go wrong, finding someone to blame can provide a target for one's anger.  In the late 1600s, New England settlers, after suffering devastating losses at the hands of Native Americans and their French allies, lashed out by hanging people as witches.  Following 9/11, some outraged people lashed out at innocent Arab-Americans. Philip Zimbardo once said "Fear and anger create aggression, and aggression against citizens of different ethnicity or race creates racism and, in turn, new forms of terrorism" (my psychology class was fortunate enough to hear his speech at Chapman University about heroism).  

Nevertheless-Time

You keep your distance
Like, for instance, when you told me we should take it slow
It's been forever.  It's now or never
and it might be time to let this go. 

I know that I - I’ve gotta get away ‘cause I’ve had enough…

Time, you always needed more time
But all we've ever had is time
So now this is the last time, but I'll be fine

Not that I'm caring
but it's apparent that you're not what you pretend to be
I thought I knew you
I'm seeing through you, and you never saw yourself with me
I know that I-I've gotta get away 'cause I've had enough....

Time, you always needed more time
But all we've ever had is time
So now this is the last time, but I'll be fine

I've gotta let this go
It's holding me down
It's holding me down!
I've gotta let this go!
I know that I-I've gotta get away 'cause I've had enough
I know that I-I've gotta get away

Time, you always needed more time
But all we've ever had is time
So now this is the last time, but I'll be fine

Time. Our whole life revolves around time.  You start out as an infant, you start your education at this moment in your life, start your career at this point of time, and retire at another.  You wake up in the morning, go to school from 8 am to 2:50 pm, and sleep at night.  Our whole lives revolve around time. Why is the human being so fascinated by time?

            There is a Chinese proverb that is roughly translated to “Time is more valuable than money.  You can get more money, but you cannot get more time”.  In other words, time is everything.

            And yet, so many people don’t value time until it is too late. These people mainly consist of students, including me.  Why else does everyone procrastinate?  We use our time to surf the internet, chat with friends, and play games, etcetera.  By the time we realize that our clock is ticking away slowly, it’s too late.  We scramble to finish our homework, study, and do whatever is necessary.  However, this only creates rubbish.  I’ll admit that even this blog post is a piece that I created after some procrastination.  Don’t ask me why.  I’ll just come up with some excuses such as “I had too much homework” or “I had a bunch of tests the next day”.  Most of which is bullshit. 

            In reality, I looked at the assignment and thought to myself, “It’s too time-consuming.  I’ll do it later”.  HA.  What a joke.  As the deadline creeps closer and closer, you get more and more frantic, but still you don’t move to do that simple assignment.  Why?  This time, I’m not going to answer this question, because I still don’t know why.  It just happens to be in my nature, I guess. 

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